


Escort Mission

by abrokenpieceoftruth



Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: F/M, Humor, Mild Hurt/Comfort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-22
Updated: 2015-02-22
Packaged: 2018-03-14 12:21:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,219
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3410450
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/abrokenpieceoftruth/pseuds/abrokenpieceoftruth
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Doctor's latest adventure with River has them stuck at a dead end—and her solution isn't quite what he was expecting.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Escort Mission

"Do you trust me?"

The Doctor was gaping into the face of a veritable army of Ogrons that were swarming towards them. They had tried to run, but somewhere they must have taken a wrong turn, because they had ended up, of all places, on the edge of the wrong plateau. They could even see the TARDIS where it was parked across the 100 meter-wide gorge. The blue seemed even bluer against the red-tinted rocks, almost as if it was taunting them. _Rude_ , he thought.

"Sweetie, I asked you a question!" The urgency in River's voice was understandable, as the first wave had climbed the carved stairs and was now charging forward, brandishing various kinds of energy weapons. 

"What? I mean, yes, yes, of course I trust you, and I know you'll be able—"

She cut him off with a kiss, one of the ones that took away his rational thought as well as his breath. It only lasted a moment, but in that time their enemies had gained at least 10 meters. "Well," he gasped, tying to remember what was happening. "Yes, I do trust you, River, but I'm not sure this is really the best time for—"

"I love you," she stated with a smile. 

Now he was beginning to get worried. "What are you—WHOOOAAAA!" The rest of his sentence was swallowed up by a yell of unmanly terror as she unceremoniously shoved him off the cliff. 

As the Doctor hurtled towards certain death, a number of thoughts flashed through his head. Naturally, a significant portion of them concerned the fact that his wife had just declared that she loved him and then pushed him off a cliff. Was she cross? Had he done something wrong recently? That was almost a given, but if he annoyed her she would usually just throw something at him, not _murder_ him. Maybe it was a psychopath thing. By the time it occurred to him that River often threw herself off buildings as a survival tactic, only a few seconds had passed and he had landed with an "oomph!" into a pile of pillows on the floor of the TARDIS.

River smirked, sipping a cup of tea from her seat on the edge of the TARDIS console. "Have fun, sweetie?"

The Doctor leapt to his feet with one last _gah_ of belated panic, spinning wildly and patting down his body as if to check that it was all there. 

"Don't—" He made one last check of his person. "Don’t _do_ that!"

She kept smiling, raising the cup to her lips again.

"I mean, you might be comfortable just…jumping into an abyss, but I—I mean—" he shuddered, glaring at her. "At least give me a bit of warning first!"

Her transformation from wicked to innocent was seamless. "You said you trusted me."

"I do, River, I trust you with my life, but I didn't think—I wasn't expecting to literally trust you _with my life_ in that exact—" He broke off. "Is that—did you _change?!_ "

River beamed. "Do you like it? Got it from Egypt. I was staying with this prince, you see—"

"And you made tea? While I was _in midair?_ "

She sighed with exasperation. "It's a time machine, Doctor. I could have spent a month on Halergan 3 if I'd wanted and still been back in time to catch you." 

The Doctor harrumphed. "Well, I'll have you know I've never taken my time responding when you've decided to—" He paused again, but this time he didn't immediately resume speaking. River froze. Had she given something away? He wasn't usually so perceptive, and she'd hidden everything so well…

"What's wrong, my love?" she asked, trying to ignore his scrutiny. 

He frowned. "There was an entire army between us and the TARDIS. How did you get back?"

It wasn't quite the direction she expected him to go, so her surprise was genuine. "Well, I fought them. You have to admit, it's kind of my M.O."

It should have been a satisfactory answer, but he wore a face of concern as he approached her. "Yes, but there were hundreds of them—thousands." He stopped, now directly in front of her, and fingered the loose sleeve of her shirt. "Why did you change your clothes?"

"Can't a girl freshen up before she greets her husband?" She attempted to mask her unease with coyness, but the Doctor wasn't fooled. 

Slowly, gently, he reached under the sleeve and rolled it up to her elbow. River maintained eye contact even when he discovered her secret: blistering welts and purpling bruises from the aliens' weapons. His thumb brushed over one of the exposed wounds and she hissed. Immediately he knelt in front of her, murmuring frantic apologies. He could see further injuries peeking out from under her long skirt, and when he gazed into her soft eyes he noticed makeup-covered cuts crisscrossing her face. "Oh, River…"

"Doctor, I'm alright," River said. She hated seeing him like this, full of guilt for something he could never have prevented. "I'm a big girl, I know how to take care of myself."

"But I could have helped you!" 

"With what, your screwdriver?" He deflated, and she instantly regretted being so harsh. "I'm sorry, sweetie. What I mean is…you're not a soldier. You never have been, not at heart." She smiled gently. "It's one of the things I love most about you. That, out there—" she pointed towards the door. "What I had to do could only be done by a soldier. No, even more than that—a warrior. An assassin. A… psychopath." She spat out the word. "I didn't need you to be a soldier today, my love. You've done Demon's Run, you know how that turns out." He cringed. "What I needed you to be was safe. That's why I didn't let you help me. Alright?"

The Doctor chuckled. "Only you, River Song, would push someone off a cliff to keep them safe."

"Well, it worked, didn't it?" When that barely got a smile, River continued. "Really, Doctor, I'm going to be fine. I've dealt with much worse than this."

"River, please." He placed a tender kiss on her palm, one of the few places not glowing an angry red. "You're hurt. I couldn't help you before; let me help you now."

With her free hand, she caressed his cheek. "Alright then, Doctor. Fix me up."

He beamed and eagerly moved to lift her from the console.

"Oh no, love, you can't," River protested.

The Doctor smirked. "Really, River, I know I look like I'm twelve, but I think you would know by now that I'm a lot stronger than--"

"No, of course you are; that's not what I mean." When he looked confused, she sighed and guiltily lifted the back of her shirt for his inspection. The Doctor hissed when he saw that almost none of the skin there was unmarked.

He straightened, then offered her his hand with a soft smile. "Shall I escort you?"

River smiled back and, with a small noise of pain, got to her feet. Together they began to move toward the medical bay.

"Wife," the Doctor murmured, only half serious. "Never do anything like this again."

River laughed outright. "Oh, I will, husband. You know I will."


End file.
